Cowboys and indians

Daddy, tell me a story with cowboys and indians.
What should happen in the story?
An indian girl is being rescued by cowboys.
Ok.. Once upon a time there was a little indian girl who...
No, let's say that she is older.
An older indian girl who wanted to leave on an adventure. Her parents, however, were afraid that too many dangers were expecting her if she left the family wigwam, so she decided to sneak out one night.
No, let's say that she can do whatever she wants.
Ok. Her parents encouraged her to leave the family wigwam and go on an adventure. Is it ok like this?
Yes.
She took her father's horse and
No, she had her own horse.
She took her own horse and travelled and travelled, beyond the known pastures. One day she reached a farm, where she met some cowboys. At first, the cowboys were afraid of the indian, but when they saw she's a girl, they
No, the cowboys should enter the story later
D, do you want to tell the story?
No, you tell it!
So the indian girl travelled far until she met a tribe of bad indians, who captured her.
How did they capture her?
I don't know, she was in the forest and they ambushed her.
No, let's say they made a trap for her.
Ok, the bad indians had digged a hole in the ground and had covered it with branches and leaves, so that when the indian girl walked
No, it was a trap with a rope that lifted her up in a tree.
D, do you know the story? Have you heard it at school?
No, I dreamt about it.
And don't you want to tell it?
No, you should tell it to me
Ok, so the bad indians made a trap out of a rope attached to a branch. When the indian girl walked past it, the rope caught her leg and soon she was dangling from the tree. The bad indians got her and took her to their village.
With the tree
WITH the tree?
Yes, the bound her to the tree and carried her with the tree.
Ok... and then they laughed at her and told her she'll never be free ever again. Then the cowboys came, correct?
Yes, the cowboys came to rescue her.
The cowboys came, shot all the bad indians, dettached the indian girl and
No, they saved her with the tree
Bloody tree!

Fun!

As a follow up to yesterday's post, here is our recent family tradition in the evenings. I'll try my best to describe it to you, but you'll have to use your imagination too...

Scene: our double bed
Characters:

• D., 4 years old (or, in his words, "four years old. Well, four years and something now"). Called "Dada" by his little brother.
• M., 1.5 years old. Limited vocabulary.
• and myself

All three of us in the bed... and the fun starts.


And if we were insects? What do you mean, insects? Daddy! I will be an insect that climbs here, you will be another insect. M.! We'll meet up and discuss. Daddy! M! Hello, insect, how are you? Hello! Daddy! Have you seen all the place we have here? M! I think I'll take a nap. Booo! Ah, you scared me, M! Oh, no, a bad insect is coming! Which bad insect, your brother? Booo! Aaargh! Quickly, let's hide! Dada? Dad, you take this blanket and put it over me. Daddy! M! Dad, cover me with the blanket! Yes, yes, I'll cover you. Why? Booo! Because I'm an insect and I need to hide from M. (under blanket) Shhhh! *pulls my hair* And now you hide too. *pulls my hair again* Aiie! Quickly, hide! *laughs* Now we go out. This? Eye Ah, the bad insect! This? Nose Now I'm a frog. This? AAAAAiiiiieee!  I jumped on you! Mouth! This? Ribbit! Ear Aaaaiiiieeeee!  I jumped on you again!
Why do you jump on me? Because I'm a frog!  *pinches me* I thought you were an insect.No, I'm not an insect anymore, I'm a frog and frogs jump. *rolls on the bed laughing* Ribbit!  This? M's hair
Aieee! What happened? Lamp? I hurt myself on the bed when I jumped. If you're not careful...
It's ok, the frogs don't feel pain. Don't pull the lamp! Now let's hide under the blanket again. This? Eye! Honeyyyyy! I can't do it anymore!

I think this is what it is usually called "spending quality time with your children"...

Time. And kids.

Finally, since yesterday, I can finally rest a little at the office. The past weeks have been quite consuming at the office, which generally means I don't get many personal things done, nor can I get some well deserved rest. I know some of my work colleagues are reading this, so let me assure you: yes, you have read that right, I actually come at the office to rest.

While I wouldn't go to the office if I was not paid for it, I really am happy when the weekend is over. Fridays are fine, I am not dreading the upcoming weekend too much. I am usually enthusiastic, making plans to do lots of stuff around the house. Useless plans, as my wife is saying, as by Sunday evening not only I haven't had the time to do half of what I would have liked, I also feel very tired and with my nerves stretched to the maximum.

The reason? Of course, everyone together now.... CHILDREN. Yes, yes, I love them, I'm happy to have them, and all the other crap. But couldn't they just sleep late on weekends? I'm not even asking for 9am or something like that. Anything later than 7am would be great! And couldn't they just play by themselves? Why is it that when I sit on the couch in front of the TV, in less than 2 minutes I have two kids on my head (literally), yelling and screaming, and pinching and hitting me or each other?

It's not just a question of having time to do stuff during the weekends, it's uselessness of what I do that gets to me. I swipe the floor? Then we have lunch or dinner and it's worse than before. I range their toys (or make them do it - hah, good one!)? 1 hour later the floor is a mine field again. I don't do their laundry, buy my wife is complaining she is washing 15 t-shirts of one of the children every week...

So yes, children are waking us early and keeping us busy the entire weekend. And every bit of stuff we want to do is subject to very careful planning and negotiation. "You take the kids there so that I can watch the match". "Let's hope one sleeps, you spend time with the other, so that I can take a shower". And so on. Yes, we get things done around the house. The typical chores, but also "fun" stuff like watching ASSE (football) and RC Toulon (rugby) weekend matches. But always with a feeling of defiance, of having managed to do that despite the odds. Managing to do stuff for us is the exploit, not the normality.

What make things better, however, is that when we talk to other parents, they have exactly the same problems. That feels good! And reassuring, somehow.

Anyway, the above is not only a vent, but also an explanation of why I haven't posted lately - too busy at work, too tired and busy at home. I am simply not so naive anymore to believe I can have one hour at the PC at home without them coming to ask me for a story or simply to play with them. It's also a question of priorities: I think it is less important to blog than to spend time with my kids. And, of course, a lot less important than to watch a match while drinking some beers - I need that for my sanity.

Well, I'll soon go and pick the oldest from the kindergarden (first day after the Summer holidays today) and the youngest at the nursery. And then at home we'll spend the typical evening together, playing and throwing toys everywhere (them) and food on the floor (them again) and speaking without stopping (them again, plus the wife) and hitting me (them again, sometimes the wife too) and then finally going to bed (all of us).

And you know what? I am actually looking forward to spend the evening again with my family... Silly me, I know - but love can't be helped.

1ADT vs 2ADT 1CHD 1INF

In case you don't know it, I work for a company that's behind many major actors in the travel industry, especially airlines. At my job, we usually have to test new features (e.g., what happens if you want to change your return flight when you haven't taken the first flight). One of the things we do is to test various combinations of parameters, including how many passengers are travelling. Two of the most frequent tests include one passenger travelling alone (1ADT for adult) or a family travelling together (2ADT 1CHD 1INF for adults, child, infant).

This Summer we went to Romania for the holidays. When I booked the plane tickets I laughed when seeing how I travel now: 2ADT 1CHD 1INF... We are now the typical family travelling :) Those of you who have kids and have travelled by plane with them, know what this configuration implies. The amount of stuff you need to take, the huge suitcases full of tens of sets of child clothes - they seem to go through 2-3 t-shirts every day. And don't forget the diapers, milk, baby food, lots of toys and other stuff. Be careful what you can take with you in the plane and what needs to be left in the main luggage. Keep the baby carriage with you in the airport, but leave it when entering the plane and hope you'll get it at the arrival. Take your seat and start the begging: please don't start screaming, please keep quiet, please don't try to leave your seat, please shut up, please fall asleep.

In short, flying with children is not too much fun, and I am saying this knowing perfectly well that our two boys are angels when compared to others I've seen on the planes. Anyways. I flew back from Romania earlier than the rest, wife and kids coming back after one week. As a side note, although I was going to the office during the day, I consider that my real holidays happened during that week. I love them, of course (the wife will probably read this, so just in case), but some time without them is so nice... I disgress, again. My point is that I travelled back alone (1ADT).

And how nice it is! I had forgotten the liberty you have when travelling alone! Suitcase dropped, just me, hands in my pockets. I could read in the plane. I could think in the plane. I got bored in the plane. Heck, I could even sleep in the plane. When in transit, I entered shops and just looked around. With too much time on my hands, I even sat down and had three beers! I travelled alone... 

When people are asking how much your life changes when you have children, I usually share the typical joys of parenthood. You know, sleep deprivation, impossibility to have a beer and watch the game at TV without someone yelling in your lap, back aches from picking toys from the floor every evening, all the stuff sticking to your feet after they have eaten, impossibility to have a conversation with another adult, etc. You know, parenthood. Quite well summarized here.

I have never thought to include travelling by plane in my examples of how parenthood changes your life. But I do now, as I have tasted again of that sweet sensation of travelling alone... And when my colleagues will test some features, I will make sure they know that 1ADT is not just another use case, different from 2ADT 1CHD 1INF. They are simply a world apart...